Dating someone after a long term relationship
Try and seek out a buddy who is in a similar situation.
It can feel less isolating if you can chat to someone about your experiences, they understand, and you can debrief together.
“Sometimes transitioning from breakups and back on the dating scene can be difficult,” says Amanda.
“You don’t need to avoid your married friends, but you can’t expect them to go out clubbing with you if they have kids and a husband at home.
“But dating looks different now – it feels different and there’s a different culture around it. ” Amanda says the key to adjusting your dating expectations is to do your research. “For people who have never done online dating, or for people who might be a little bit older, it can be really daunting. If the online world is too scary, then there are different Meetups and community experiences you can do.” “I always suggest ‘dating yourself’.
Be mindful that if you are dating someone, they might also be dating other people. If you always wanted to be a runner or take up a movie course, sign up and meet people with similar interests. It will help you feel more confident, more social and allow you to meet you people with similar interests.
At the same time, this means you can date as many people as you like.” “Not only will your expectations be different, but you’re also going to want different things, particularly if you’ve come out of a relationship with children. You might be looking for companionship or intimacy, so it’s really important to reset and ask yourself what your purpose is going back into the dating scene. You don’t have to date other people, you can date yourself!
” If you’re single and all your mates are happily loved-up, broaden your support network.
Here, Amanda gives some stellar advice to help new singles build their confidence and emotional health after a long-term relationship breakup, and navigate the new dating rules. Anyone who’s recently broken up from a long-term relationship knows how emotionally scary facing a new life – sans your ex – can be.
So rather than thinking about how to tell someone your life story, ask yourself if they really need to know this information.
Thinking this way can be more empowering and validating of where you are in your life.
“It’s normal to feel grief that you’re in a different life stage,” she says.
“I encourage anyone that is feeling this way to get themselves into an emotionally healthy and empowered space first.