Tips for dating a widow

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You can gently drop some hints about the pictures, especially if they are on the bed stand table.

If there are children and some of the pictures are family pictures, it is probably unrealistic to think that every picture will be put away.

TALKING ABOUT A LATE SPOUSE: SHOULD YOU ASK QUESTIONS? If a couple were married at a young age, married a long time, or have children/grandchildren, it is going to be very difficult to talk about his/her life without mentioning a late spouse.

This can only be threatening to you, if you allow it to be. He or she is not coming back, so you are not going to lose your new mate to him or her. In general, when you get to know someone you want to share your past with him or her. This time it just happens to include a person that is no longer alive.

One would include those of her intended and his late spouse, and the next wall would be a continuation of pictures of the life they were leading.

She did not feel threatened by these pictures, but instead thanked the late spouse for helping to make her fiancé into the wonderful man with whom she gets to spend the rest of her life.

If circumstances require that you move into the home shared with a late spouse, it would be beneficial to have a frank discussion about what can be changed to make you feel as if it is your home too.

Try to be cognizant of these facts and not insist that everything that belonged to the late spouse be disposed of.Rather than demanding that all the pictures be put away, you might want to have a heart-to-heart discussion about how they make you feel.Without being put on the defensive, your new partner, wanting to please you, will probably try to be accommodating. MOVING INTO A HOME SHARED WITH A LATE SPOUSE If there are no financial concerns and this situation can be avoided, it would probably be best to move to a new home - one where you can both make a fresh start and it can be yours together.Take pause and ask yourself if you would rather your new partner didn't care about his/her late spouse.You might consider the fact that the better the relationship a new partner had in a past relationship, the more he/she knows about how to make unions work.

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